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People with mental and physical disabilities have been using service animals and emotional support animals for decades. According to the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), under Titles II and III, a service animal “is any dog specifically trained to do work or perform tasks for the benefit of an individual with a disability including a […]
People with mental and physical disabilities have been using service animals and emotional support animals for decades. According to the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), under Titles II and III, a service animal “is any dog specifically trained to do work or perform tasks for the benefit of an individual with a disability including a physical, sensory, psychiatric, intellectual or other mental disability.”
But it’s not just trained service animals that can help us cope with life’s challenges, all pets seem to have the ability to calm us, center us, and just make us feel all around better about being on the planet.
Indeed, there are many mental health benefits of having a pet, and here are some of them:
Petting Reduces Stress
Your dog or cat may love when you pet them, but it turns out it’s equally beneficial to you as well! Rhythmic petting has been shown to release oxytocin, the hormone related to stress and anxiety relief. Once this is released your blood pressure and cortisol levels will decrease and you’ll feel much better.
You Don’t Feel Alone
The only thing worse than actually being alone, is feeling alone when we’re around other people. So often we can be with friends and loved ones, yet feel totally disconnected.
But when we spend time with our pets, we feel like we’re with true companions. They make us feel happy, safe and secure. Perhaps it’s because they don’t judge us and love us unconditionally that allows us to connect in a way that is often not possible with other human beings.
Pets Help Us Be More at Peace
It’s hard for most people to be completely in the moment. We’re either regretting the past or worrying about the future. But when we engage with our pets, it helps us take our minds off of any negative stressors and focus them on the adorable fluffball in front of us.
They Help Your Body Release Feel Good Chemicals
When your dog rolls around on his back or your cat rubs her head under your chin, you can’t help but smile. And when you smile, your body releases serotonin and dopamine, which are nerve transmitters associated with calmness and happiness.
Don’t have a pet of your own at home? You can still gain these benefits by volunteering at a shelter. There are many animals out there alone who would love your companionship, and you’ll feel great in the process.
If you or a loved one is interested in exploring mental health treatment, please contact me today. While I’m not fluffy and don’t have a tail, I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help you.
Personal Strengths
Positive psychology is the study of well-being and identifies tools and behaviors that increase positive feelings. One area of research is cultivating personal strengths to increase wellness. A personal strength is defined as “a pre-existing capacity for a particular way of behaving, thinking, or feeling that is authentic and energizing to the user, and enables optimal functioning, development, and performance”(Paquette,2018).
Research suggests that people who identify and use personal strengths:
show a decrease in depression,
increased sense of well being,
Increased optimism,
stronger social and romantic relationships,
buffers against stress.
Positive Psychology researchers Martin Seligman and Christopher Peterson identified seven categories of strengths:
Wisdom and Knowledge:
Strengths: Creativity, curiosity, open-mindedness, love of learning, perspective
Humanity:
Strengths: love, kindness, social intelligence,
Courage:
Strengths: bravery, integrity, persistence, vitality
Justice:
Strengths: citizenship, fairness, leadership
Temperance:
Strengths: forgiveness and mercy, humility and modesty, prudence, self-regulation
Transcendence:
Strengths: appreciation of beauty and excellence, gratitude, hope, humor, spirituality
Identifying personal strengths:
Perhaps the easiest way to identify personal strengths is to take Seligman and Peterson’s Values in Action survey at www.viacharacter.org. This free online survey will identify your core strengths.
Incorporating Personal Strengths into daily life:
Once you’ve identified your strengths, take some time to ask yourself the following:
How am I using my strengths in my daily life?
Am I using all my strengths?
Are there new ways to use neglected strengths in my daily life?
Identifying and using your personal strengths increases well being. If you needs help identifying your strengths, psychotherapy can help. Meeting with a psychologist can help you explored blocks to happiness and embracing the best parts of yourself.
Resources:
The Happiness Toolbox by Jonah Paquette(2018)
VIA Character Strengths:
https://www.viacharacter.org/
Pamela Marsh, Psy.D.
Pamela Marsh is a licensed psychologist at Marsh Psychology Group. She can be reached at pmarsh@marshpsychologygroup.com or 248-869-2024.
Positive Psychology is the science of well-being. It focuses on skills that foster good feelings and resilience. One of the most powerful and impactful area of positive psychology is the practice of gratitude.
Gratitude is defined as a sense of wonder, thankfulness, and appreciation for life. It consisted of 2 related steps:
Research shows that regular gratitude practice impacts both our psychology and bodies. First, gratitude has been shown to “ decrease rates of depression and stress, while enhancing positive mental states such as joy, optimism and tranquility”(Paquette, 2018). Second, people who regularly practice gratitude, have overall improved physical health, stronger immune systems, and reduced rates of stress-related illnesses. Third, our brains change structurally and chemically in ways that increase well-being.
Jonah Paquette, Psy.D.(2018) suggests a good place to start is to start noticing positive occurrences in our daily lives. The “Three Good Things” technique is a simple way to start a gratitude practice. You will need a few sheets of paper or a notebook and a pen/pencil for this exercise.
Three Good Things
Instructions: Before bed each night for 2 weeks
1) Write down three things that went well that day. They can be little or big things, there is no right answer. Example: I had a restful day off and feel relaxed.
2) Explain why you think this happened and or your contribution to the event. Example: I had a restful day because I kept the TV turned off and did not check my work email.
Try to challenge yourself not to repeat an entry over the next 2 weeks.
Shifting to a Gratitude Mindset
Once you feel comfortable noticing good things in your life, change your journal entries to reflect what you are grateful for, and explain your reasoning. This subtle adjustment adds a deeper meaning to your practice. It widens the “goodness” in your life to include an acknowledgment of an external source of goodness and an experience of being thankful. This shift deepens the positive impact on your mood and physical health.
References and resources:
The Happiness Tool Box by Jonah Paquette, Psy.D. 2018 PESI Publishing and Media, Eau Claire, WI.
https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/
Be Well,
Dr. Marsh
Pamela Marsh, Psy.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist at Marsh Psychology Group, in Huntington Woods, Michigan. She can be reached at pmarsh@marshpsychologygroup.com
Boundaries in relationship are the key to fufilling connecitons.
Many of us have difficulty with boundaries in relationships and might not even be aware of the problem. If you often feel resentful, drained, unfulfilled, or taken advantage of in your relationships, poor boundaries could be the reason. Having boundaries with others means you can verbalize or act to enforce your limits and maintain your sense of self. Areas of interpersonal boundaries can be physical, mental/emotional, or resource-based.
Physical Boundaries: How others comment on your appearance, limits related to physical intimacy and touch
Mental/Emotional Boundaries: Autonomy in one’s opinions and beliefs, not feeling responsible for someone else’s feelings
Resource Boundaries: Limits on how much time you are available, how much money you contribute, what you are willing to do for the other person
How to Start Setting Boundaries
Establishing healthy boundaries in your relationships starts with being in touch with your own needs. We can become so used to putting others before ourselves we don’t even recognize what we need, let alone have the capacity to assert those needs! Start by noticing where you feel resentful, drained, unfulfilled, or taken advantage of in your relationships. These feelings are a sign of your unmet needs and can be used to identify where you would benefit from establishing healthier boundaries.
If healthy boundaries were never modeled for you, it can be a scary thing to try. Sometimes we are so used to automatically saying ‘yes’ we feel afraid to say ‘no’ and this becomes a resources issue. If this is the case for you, start by identifying a different response such as”‘let me think about that and get back to you”-this will allow you time to think things through and check in with yourself to determine if you genuinely want to say ‘yes’ or would be doing so out of obligation or fear.
Similarly, sometimes we are so used to focusing on others’ needs and emotions we become uncomfortable looking at our own. We have developed the false belief that meeting the needs of others will keep us safe while meeting our own needs is unsafe. In reality, fulfillment and regulation (safety) comes from being attuned to our own needs – our true self – and asserting those needs in our relationships.
It is important to note, not all boundaries need to be verbalized. Sometimes the most effective way to establish a boundary is through your behavior, and the other person might not even be aware of it. In situations where we do communicate our limits to someone, boundaries are not ultimatums or ways to try to control the other person. The goal is to be clear on our limits and become responsible for our needs in relationships, while also respecting the limits of others. When first starting this process, try writing out what you want to communicate to the other person first. Consider the relationship and what you think is beneficial for the other person to know regarding your boundary. Remember, we do not owe an explanation for our needs, but it can be helpful to communicate the ‘why’ depending on the situation.
Growing Pains
Expect to feel uncomfortable when you start this process, as with most changes we make, but sometimes it can feel too uncomfortable to do on our own. Because many of us were taught to have unhealthy boundaries in childhood, the reasons behind these difficulties are often deeply rooted and difficult to address without support. Working with a mental health professional can provide guidance in understanding our difficulties with boundaries and help us navigate healthy changes.
References:
LePera, N. (2021). How to Do the Work. Macmillan Publishers, p. 179-205.
-Laura Gross, LMSW
Laura Gross is a Clinical Therapist with Marsh Psychology Group.
You can contact her at:
(248)860-2024
lgross@marshpsychologygroup.com
Our mental health significantly impacts our quality of life, so it makes sense that we would want to do all we can to improve it. This may include things like eating healthy foods, exercising, and getting enough quality sleep each night. But there is something else that greatly influences our mental health and that […]
Our mental health significantly impacts our quality of life, so it makes sense that we would want to do all we can to improve it. This may include things like eating healthy foods, exercising, and getting enough quality sleep each night.
But there is something else that greatly influences our mental health and that is a community and a sense of belonging. Human beings are wired for connection. When we feel connected to others, we feel loved and supported. Friends can often help alleviate the stress in our life because our friends are there for us to lean on.
If you have been feeling alone and isolated, here are some ways you can find your own community and begin to connect with others:
What activities and hobbies do you have? You may want to join a book club or take a painting lesson. If you’re athletic or used to playing a sport in school, maybe you could join a local team. You’ll no doubt find it easier to connect with others who enjoy doing the same things you do.
Being of service to others is highly rewarding, and volunteering is also a great way to connect with others who share similar values. What causes do you feel passionate about? What charities do you support? Check out their website or give them a call to see what volunteering opportunities they may have available.
Do you have a particular religion or spiritual practice you connect with? Maybe it’s time to get back to your church or try taking that meditation class you’ve been thinking about. Is there a political cause that speaks to your heart? Helping others reach a meaningful goal can be a great way to find purpose in your own life.
Humans are not meant to be alone. We need to socialize. If you have been feeling down, now’s the time to go out and make some new connections.
And if you’ve been dealing with depression and anxiety for some time and could use someone to talk to, please give me a call.
SOURCES:
The old saying goes, “Into every life a little rain must fall.” Stress is like rain. A little of it can be a good thing. But too much can cause havoc and devastation. Our bodies are designed to handle a little bit of acute or sudden stress. But when stress is prolonged or becomes chronic, […]
The old saying goes, “Into every life a little rain must fall.” Stress is like rain. A little of it can be a good thing. But too much can cause havoc and devastation.
Our bodies are designed to handle a little bit of acute or sudden stress. But when stress is prolonged or becomes chronic, it can have devastating consequences to our health.
Here are just some of the ways stress can negatively impact your body:
Respiratory Issues
Prolonged stress can lead to respiratory issues such as shortness of breath. Individuals who do not have an underlying respiratory disease may not be very impacted. But for those with pre-existing conditions such as COPD and asthma, stress can dangerously exacerbate the situation.
Heart Health
When we’re stressed we are in fight or flight mode. This causes our heart to beat faster and our blood vessels to dilate. In short-term scenarios, these physical manifestations help get us out of danger.
But for prolonged periods, this can put a lot of stress on our heart and blood vessels, potentially leading to a heart attack or stroke.
Gut Health
Did you know that 80% of your immune system is located in your gut? It’s incredibly important to ensure your gut is healthy!
But chronic stress can wreak havoc on your gut as it changes the beneficial gut bacteria. And a change in this bacteria can negatively impact your mood. And when you’re already feeling stressed, the last thing you need is to also feel depressed.
Sexual Health
Both the male and female reproductive systems are influenced by the nervous system. When we are stressed, our sexual hormones can get out of balance and we can lose sexual desire. Men may find it hard to achieve and maintain an erection. Stress can also make it hard to conceive and affect a woman’s menstrual cycle.
As you can see, stress can really impact your physical health in a negative way. While we can’t stop the rain from falling or stress from entering our lives, we can practice healthy stress management. That means eating right, getting enough exercise, and quality sleep each night.
SOURCES:
The vagus nerve is the longest nerve in your body. The Vagus nerve connects your brain to all the organs throughout the body, including the gut-intestines, stomach, liver, kidneys- and the heart and lungs. The word “vagus” means “wanderer” in Latin, which accurately represents how the nerve wanders all over the body and reaches various […]
The vagus nerve is the longest nerve in your body. The Vagus nerve connects your brain to all the organs throughout the body, including the gut-intestines, stomach, liver, kidneys- and the heart and lungs.
The word “vagus” means “wanderer” in Latin, which accurately represents how the nerve wanders all over the body and reaches various organs. The vagus nerve helps you to remain calm when you are stressed and to know when you are no longer in danger. It helps you to “rest and digest.” When the vagus is stimulated, you feel calmer, more compassionate, and clearer. Stimulating the vagus benefits your autonomic nervous system and your mental health.
What is most important about the vagus nerve is its tone. Increasing your vagal tone activates the parasympathetic nervous system, and having higher vagal tone means that your body can relax faster after stress. Healthy vagal tone means emotional regulation, greater connection, and better physical health. Poor vagal tone can create issues with breathing, digestion, body inflammation, heart rate, liver function, cause chronic stress, and impair sleep.
“The vagal response reduces stress. It reduces our heart rate and blood pressure. It changes the function of certain parts of the brain, stimulates digestion, all those things that happen when we are relaxed.” — Dr. Mladen Golubic, MD, Medical Director of the Cleveland
1. Breathwork- diaphragmatic breathing
Most people take about 10 to 14 breaths each minute. Taking about 6 breaths over the course of a minute is a great way to relieve stress. You should breathe in deeply from your diaphragm. When you do this, your stomach should expand outward. Your exhale should be long and slow. This is key to stimulating the vagus nerve and reaching a state of relaxation. Place one hand on your stomach and the other hand on your chest. As you breathe in, feel your stomach expand, and when you exhale, your stomach should go back down.
2. Diving Reflex
To stimulate the diving reflex, you need cold exposure. You can splash cold water on your face or put ice cubes in a ziploc bag on your face. The diving reflex slows your heart rate, increases blood flow to your brain, reduces anger and relaxes your body. Acute cold exposure has been shown to activate the vagus nerve. Researchers have also found that exposing yourself to cold on a regular basis can lower your sympathetic “fight or flight” response and increase parasympathetic activity through the vagus nerve. You can take cold showers or go outside in cold temperatures with minimal clothing. Try finishing your next shower with at least 30 seconds of cold water and see how you feel.
3. Humming, Singing or Gargling
Humming, singing or gargling tones the vagus nerve. Chanting the word “Om” can decrease stress levels.
4. Probiotics
It’s clear to researchers that healthy gut bacteria improve brain function by activating the vagus nerve.
5. Omega 3 Fatty Acids
You can get these from fish oil, or if you’re a vegan, you can find them in chia seeds, flaxseed, hemp seed oil and walnuts. Researchers have discovered that omega-3 fatty acids increase vagal tone and vagal activity. Studies show Omega 3’s reduce heart rate and increase heart rate variability, which means they likely stimulate the vagus nerve.
6. Mindfulness and Meditation
Mindfulness is taking time to pay attention to the present moment and what you are doing in it. Meditation teaches us to focus on our breath and listen to our hearts. Studies have shown that meditation reduces sympathetic “fight or flight” activity and increases vagal modulation.
7. Yoga
Yoga is a parasympathetic activation exercise that helps with digestion, blood flow and more.
8. Exercise.
Exercise stimulates the vagus nerve, which may explain its beneficial brain and mental health effects. Many brain health experts recommend exercise as their number one piece of advice for optimal brain health.
9. Massage
Research shows that massages can stimulate the vagus nerve and increase vagal activity and vagal tone. The vagus nerve can also be stimulated by massaging several specific areas of the body. Foot massages (reflexology) have been shown to increase vagal modulation and heart rate variability, and decrease the “fight or flight” sympathetic response
10. Socializing and Laughing
Socializing and laughing can reduce your body’s main stress hormone, and we now know it is likely doing this by stimulating the vagus nerve. Researchers have also discovered that reflecting on positive social connections improves vagal tone and increases positive emotions. Laughter has been shown to increase heart-rate variability and improve mood.
So, as you can see, there are many things you can do to tone your vagus nerve and improve both your physical and mental health, including improving symptoms of anxiety and depression.
If you feel you could benefit from further support and counseling, consider finding a qualified therapist you trust who can help you manage your mental health.
Carol Van Kampen, LMSW
Carol Van Kampen, LMSW is an individual private practice psychotherapist who specializes in anxiety, depression, grief, and trauma treatment at Marsh Psychology Group. Carol is EMDR trained. Contact her at marshpsychologygroup.com
cvankampen@marshpsychologygroup.com
https://marshpsychologygroup.com/carol-van-kampen-lmsw/
It is said that if you live long enough, you’ll eventually hit middle age. Once they hit that mark, many people begin to look around at their life and notice what is working and what isn’t. Unfortunately, some people notice much of their life isn’t working, at least not in the way they thought it […]
It is said that if you live long enough, you’ll eventually hit middle age. Once they hit that mark, many people begin to look around at their life and notice what is working and what isn’t. Unfortunately, some people notice much of their life isn’t working, at least not in the way they thought it would, and a crisis strikes.
What’s Really Going on in a Midlife Crisis?
For many of us, middle age is the first time in our lives that we pause for a moment to reflect. Birth, in a way, is like a slingshot, catapulting us into life at a significant speed. That momentum never slows as we gain an education, make friends, choose a career, commit to a significant other, have children, raise them as best we can, and plan for our retirement.
Eventually the pace of life begins to slow and we find we have more time to take stock of our lives; of what we’ve become and where we seem to be headed. And what do many of us find at this juncture?
We find we’ve been so busy earning a good living, keeping up with the Joneses (whoever they are), and pleasing everyone around us, that we haven’t always made decisions based on our own self-interests. In other words, we find ourselves lost and unable to recognize our lives as anything that we once imagined.
4 Ways to Cope with a Midlife Crisis
It’s important to understand that in this situation, the word “crisis” is a bit dramatic. Midlife crises aren’t traumas; they are instead wakeup calls that alert us to the fact we need to start taking better care of our minds, hearts and bodies.
With this in mind, here are four ways you can cope with your own midlife wakeup call.
Get Active
As I mentioned, midlife is generally when many of us finally begin to slow down. While this slowing can lead to mental and emotional insights, it can also lead to aches and pains. In other words, slow your pace of life but not your physical activity.
Now is the time to become even more active. If you haven’t been exercising, start now. Take up a new sport, try dance lessons, go hiking. Keeping your body limber and pain-free will help you stay positive.
Embrace Your Creative Side
Everyone has a creative side. That’s what life is, one big creative project. But many of us completely ignore our creative impulses either because of a lack of time or a belief that we’re “not talented enough.” That’s hogwash! Tapping into your creativity is one of the best ways to reconnect with your true self.
Do something to feed your creativity. Write in a journal. Learn how to paint. Take piano lessons. Not only will this bring you joy, learning something new keeps your brain young and active and fends off dementia and Alzheimer’s.
Make Some Changes
Midlife is an opportunity to make some changes you’ve been wanting to make. A change could be a simple as finally painting a room in your house, to getting your teeth whitened or a tattoo you’ve had your eye on, or to finally dumping some of your toxic friends. Start making choices based on your own needs, you’ve earned it.
Hang Out with Like-Minded People
Social interaction is key to a happy and healthy life. But many of us spend the majority of our adult lives around people we don’t like very much: namely coworkers and the parents of our children’s friends. Now is the time to surround yourself with those people who support and nourish you, and share common passions and interests.
A midlife crisis doesn’t have to be a crisis at all but a chance for you to take control and make different choices in your life.
If you or a loved one is experiencing a midlife crisis and is interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.
Affecting nearly 40 million adults in the United States, anxiety is one of the country’s most common mental health disorders. Sleep disturbances such as insomnia are highly prevalent amongst those who suffer from an anxiety disorder. If you have trouble falling asleep, it may heighten or trigger your anxiety, and vice versa. While it can […]
Affecting nearly 40 million adults in the United States, anxiety is one of the country’s most common mental health disorders. Sleep disturbances such as insomnia are highly prevalent amongst those who suffer from an anxiety disorder. If you have trouble falling asleep, it may heighten or trigger your anxiety, and vice versa. While it can be difficult for an anxiety sufferer to fall asleep, it’s not impossible; read on for five ways to get a better night’s sleep.
Physical activity is an important component of overall health. Exercise will produce chemicals in your brain that will help elevate your mood and decrease your stress or tension, which will provide some relief for your anxiety. Exercise will also help you sleep. Not only will the physical exertion improve the quality of your sleep, but it will also help ensure you’re able to sleep without interruption.
Daylight helps set sleep patterns, so try to spend at least 30 minutes outdoors during the day time. Daylight sun exposure is critical if you have trouble falling asleep because it helps to regulate the body’s circadian clock.
Studies have shown that people who make unhealthy food choices are more likely to suffer from sleep disturbances. Healthy balanced meals will keep your energy stable which will help you manage your mood and improve your sleep habits.
It’s also important to avoid big meals or alcohol for several hours before bedtime. Smoking is another bad habit that can cause many health problems, which will negatively affect your sleep in a number of ways.
Create a routine that you execute nightly, an hour or two before bedtime. Minimizing screen time will help calm your mind and prepare you for sleep. Change into your pajamas and do some light reading, or find other ways to charge down and get ready to sleep. Make sure you go to bed around the same time every night too, including weekends.
Keep your bedroom cool, dark, and quiet, without distractions. Have a window open to keep the room cool and the air smelling fresh. A clean room and clean linens will make your bedroom more inviting. Make sure you have a good quality mattress and pillow to maximize your comfort.
Are you struggling with falling or staying asleep, and need help maintaining healthy sleep habits? A licensed professional can help. Call my office today and let’s schedule an appointment to talk.
Anxiety is a natural dialogue between our mind and body. It’s a red flag that something might be going on in our surroundings that requires our attention. For most of us, anxiety is an uncomfortable but fleeting feeling that pops up on occasion during particularly stressful times. For some, anxiety may be more present and […]
Anxiety is a natural dialogue between our mind and body. It’s a red flag that something might be going on in our surroundings that requires our attention.
For most of us, anxiety is an uncomfortable but fleeting feeling that pops up on occasion during particularly stressful times. For some, anxiety may be more present and color more of their daily life. And for still others, anxiety is a constant torture; a nightmare they can’t awaken from.
Depending on your level of anxiety, there are some healthy coping strategies you can use to manage it. Here are 4 I recommend:
Mind Your Mind
How often are you aware of your own thoughts? Our thoughts tend to bubble up from our subconscious without much control from our conscious mind. For those experiencing anxiety, many of these thoughts will be negative and frightening, although the majority will not be based in reality.
Start to pay attention to the thoughts behind the feelings. Instead of thinking the worst will happen, challenge the thought. What is the realistic likelihood the worst will happen on a scale of 1 – 10?
The more you do this, the more you will retrain your mind to process life differently.
Remind Yourself What Anxiety Is
Beyond frightful emotions, anxiety often comes with physical sensations like tightness in the chest, rapid heartbeat and shortness of breath. In other words, it can feel like you are dying.
But you’re not.
You are having a physical response to an irrational fear or thought. Remind yourself of that ancient dialogue your mind and body are having and know that, in reality, you are okay.
Learn Your Triggers
Once you learn to pay attention to your thoughts and remain calm knowing you are having a natural reaction to what you perceive as a threat, find the threat. Observe your surroundings to find the potential trigger that activated your reaction. If there are other people in the room, notice their reaction to your trigger. Do they seem uneasy or concerned in the least? Chances are they don’t because the threat is not real. Store this information away so eventually your subconscious mind will stop thinking of the trigger as a threat.
Breathe
Slow, deep breaths have been shown to instantly calm a person. Your heart rate will slow, your muscles will relax, your entire body will return to a normal state of being. Don’t underestimate the power of just taking a moment to breathe.
If you find you need a bit more help controlling your anxiety, please get in touch with me. I would be more than happy to discuss treatment options with you.