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Dealing with a loved one who is depressed is always tough. When that loved one happens to be a parent, the roles flip and you become responsible for their mental health care. Older people get depressed for a variety of reasons such as declining physical ability, a chronic physical illness (e.g stroke), friends and family […]
Dealing with a loved one who is depressed is always tough. When that loved one happens to be a parent, the roles flip and you become responsible for their mental health care. Older people get depressed for a variety of reasons such as declining physical ability, a chronic physical illness (e.g stroke), friends and family dying, history of anxiety/depression, and dissatisfaction with how they lived their life. For example, they may feel like they didn’t accomplish enough.
A lot of seniors are flippant about depression, equate it to weakness, and refuse to talk about their mental health for fear of burdening their loved ones. How can you support a depressed parent? Here are some helpful tips.
1. Look out for the symptoms– Older people are unlikely to bring up their mental health struggles, so you need to be very observant. Look out for the following, they are signs that your parent might be depressed.
2. Encourage them to see a therapist– Gently suggest that your parent see a therapist to discuss the symptoms they are experiencing. Make sure you suggest it in a way that doesn’t make them feel bad or weak. Schedule an appointment on their behalf and go with them the first time. Monitor them to make sure they attend sessions regularly and take their medication (if this applies).
3. Offer your love and care- Make a greater effort to be there for them and do things that will make their lives easier. For example, you can help them get groceries and do laundry. Make sure you offer help in a way that doesn’t make them feel like they aren’t capable of taking care of themselves. For many elderly people, admitting that they’re depressed and need help can be difficult.
4. Talk to them about their feelings– Have open and honest conversations about how they’re feeling. Make sure you listen to them and honor their emotions. Listening offers direct support and comfort.
5. Watch out for suicidal signs– If your parent displays any sign of suicidal thinking such as talking about death often and giving away family heirlooms or other important possessions, you need to get them immediate help. Contact their therapist, call a suicide hotline, or take them to your local psychiatric emergency room to prevent tragedy.
Watching your parent suffer from depression can be heartbreaking. It’s natural to want to force them to get help, but being pushy can cause them to withdraw from you. Take a gentle approach that makes them feel respected and like a competent adult. Practice patience, offer emotional support and ensure that they follow their therapist’s advice.
If you have a depressed parent and you’re looking for a therapist who is experienced in geriatric issues, contact me to book a session.
When a loved one is depressed, it’s often difficult to know what to say. Even with the best of intentions, friends and family can often say the wrong thing, which can make the person feel misunderstood and even more isolated. If you’ve never suffered from depression, you may simply not know what is appropriate and […]
When a loved one is depressed, it’s often difficult to know what to say. Even with the best of intentions, friends and family can often say the wrong thing, which can make the person feel misunderstood and even more isolated.
If you’ve never suffered from depression, you may simply not know what is appropriate and what is not when speaking with someone who is suffering. Here are three things you should never say to someone with depression.
Pretending to Understand When You Don’t
Perhaps the worst thing you can say to someone who is depressed is, “I completely understand. After [insert specific event] I was depressed for weeks.”
The truth is, grief and depression are two entirely different things. Feeling sad after the loss of a pet or being laid off from your job is expected. These feelings are not chronic but rather expected after an isolated incident.
Depression is chronic and is often not associated with one specific incident. Clinical depression can last for years and sufferers typically cannot pinpoint the reason they are feeling what they are feeling.
Unless you have truly suffered from depression, don’t tell your loved one that you understand. Though you may want to, you simply don’t.
Sharing Information from an Article You Read
Even well-researched and thoughtful articles on the topic of depression cannot possibly paint the full picture or offer the best course of treatment or action. As everyone is an individual, all treatment needs to be individualized as well.
You may have read that exercise can help lesson some of the symptoms of depression. And while exercise can release powerful “feel good” hormones, exercise alone will not offer enough full relief from the disease. Also, by lending this kind of “quick fix” advice, you risk coming across as patronizing and may make the sufferer feel as though they are not trying hard enough to “het better.”
Why Not Take a Vacation?
If you’ve never suffered from depression, it’s easy to confuse it with stress, but the two could not be more different. Telling a depressed person they just need to relax more is like telling a paraplegic they just need a new pair of shoes. Neither solution gets to the root cause of the issue.
When you love someone who is depressed, you want to help in any way you can. But offering advice or suggestions when you are unclear of what it is they are experiencing is not helpful. The best thing you can do is educate yourself on depression so you may better understand what you’re loved one is truly going through.
It is also advisable that you speak to them about seeking treatment. A therapist will be able to help your loved one understand what is happening to them and guide them through the journey back to health. If you or a loved one is interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.
Of all the words in the English language, depression must be one of the most misunderstood. Why does this term seem to confuse so many people? Why is its real meaning so hard to grasp? It is because the term has two starkly contrasting meanings, depending on who is using it. Among clinicians, the term […]
Of all the words in the English language, depression must be one of the most misunderstood. Why does this term seem to confuse so many people? Why is its real meaning so hard to grasp? It is because the term has two starkly contrasting meanings, depending on who is using it.
Among clinicians, the term depression is used to describe a debilitating syndrome that robs people of their energy, memories, ability to concentrate, love and experience joy. This is not just an emotional state, but a physical one that impacts specific regions of the brain. Depression actually lights up the brain’s pain circuitry, inducing a state of suffering that can become debilitating.
Beyond this, depression is actually neurotoxic, meaning the disorder can eventually lead to the death of neurons in critical memory and reasoning areas of the brain, including the hippocampus and prefrontal cortex. Simply stated – depression causes brain damage.
Colloqiual Usage
Confusion abounds when the term ‘depression’ is used by people in everyday conversation, however. In these instances, they usually are referring to something far less serious or clinical. In fact, most people use the term as a synonym for mere sadness or being slightly upset.
For instance, you will often here people make comments such as, “I was so depressed when Starbucks dropped its pumpkin spice latte,” or “Oh my God, I just ripped a whole in my favorite pair of jeans. I am like, so depressed right now.” No, you’re not, you’re bummed, pretty disappointed in fact, but you are certainly not depressed. These kinds of disappointments, while frustrating, are simply a part of life.
But ripped jeans and discontinued menu items have little effect on our ability to function, and the feelings of disappointment and annoyance rarely last for very long. A friendly word from a loved one or a hug is generally all that’s needed to get over the perceived “crisis.”
In contrast, clinical depression often persists for months, and no amount of friendly support from loved ones is enough to make it any less debilitating.
Time for New Language?
And that is where the confusion lies, and why many people simply don’t understand the true ramifications of clinical depression. It is also why those who suffer from depression are met with relative indifference when they open up to friends and family about their condition.
The sad reality is that, because of this profound confusion, many depressed patients are expected to simply “snap out of it” by their friends and family. No one would ever take this attitude with someone suffering from cancer or kidney disease; the admonition is equally offensive and inappropriate in the case of clinical depression.
Perhaps it is time to come up with a new term to describe the symptoms of clinical depression. By using new language, more people might understand the disease and show more compassion toward individuals suffering from it.
If you or a loved one is interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.
As teens struggle through the tough transition period of childhood into young adulthood, it can be difficult to decipher a teen’s behavior. Are their out-of-control emotions and conduct a result of the natural process of adolescence, or is it something more serious? According to the National Institute of Mental Health, in 2016 approximately 3.1 million […]
As teens struggle through the tough transition period of childhood into young adulthood, it can be difficult to decipher a teen’s behavior. Are their out-of-control emotions and conduct a result of the natural process of adolescence, or is it something more serious?
According to the National Institute of Mental Health, in 2016 approximately 3.1 million adolescents between the ages of 12 to 17 experienced at least one episode of major depression. Depression is a serious mood disorder that, if left untreated, can cause serious short and long-term mental and even physical health problems. Moreover, depression carries a high risk of suicide.
Below are six signs you can look for to determine if your teen could be experiencing depression.
1. Excessive Crying and Sadness
While emotions tend to run high in most teenagers, excessive crying and sadness that persist for more than two weeks could be a sign of depression.
2. Loss of Interest and Motivation
When a teen is depressed, they may have trouble concentrating. This will cause them to lose motivation and interest in activities they once enjoyed.
3. Problems at School
The loss of concentration and motivation could also result in problems at school. Skipping school, plunging grades and a lack of participation in school and extracurricular activities are all signs that could be pointing to teen depression.
4. Changes in Weight or Eating Habits
Has your teen’s eating habits changed? Are they skipping meals or eating larger portions more frequently? Eating more or less, as well as dramatic changes in weight (either gained or lost) is one of the signs of depression.
5. Withdrawal
Depression causes people to isolate themselves. It’s not uncommon for a depressed teen to begin to withdraw from friends and family, choosing instead to spend time alone or locked in their room. If your teen is depressed, you may notice them begin to avoid spending time with friends and loved ones.
6. Suicidal Ideation
Thoughts or expressions of death or suicide should never be taken lightly. Threats or even jokes about suicide are a cry for help from your teen. If your teen expresses thoughts of suicide, react calmly, and then seek immediate help. Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.
If you suspect that your teen is experiencing depression, it’s important that you seek professional help from an experienced mental health professional that specializes in treating teens. Call me today and let’s set up an appointment to talk.
Seasonal depression, also known as Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD for short, is a form of depression that typically impacts people during the winter months, when exposure to sunlight and temperature changes naturally occur. Research indicates that about six percent of the American population, primarily those people living in northern states, suffers from SAD. It is […]
Seasonal depression, also known as Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD for short, is a form of depression that typically impacts people during the winter months, when exposure to sunlight and temperature changes naturally occur.
Research indicates that about six percent of the American population, primarily those people living in northern states, suffers from SAD. It is also believed that one in ten Americans experience subsyndromal SAD, a milder form of seasonal depression, also called the “winter blues.” And, though the disorder can affect both men and women, it is more common among women.
Symptoms of seasonal depression include:
Though some people confuse SAD as simply moodiness, it is a real form of depression that is dependent on an individual’s hormonal state, as well as seasonal characteristics like exposure to light and temperature.
If you or a loved one are affected by seasonal depression, here are three ways you can reduce the symptoms that impact the quality of life.
Get Outside
While the temperatures outside may be a bit harsher than you’d like, it’s still a great idea to bundle up and get some sunshine, as much as you can. Our bodies need sunlight to boost our levels of vitamin D. Among other things, a vitamin D deficiency has been linked to mood swings, headaches and fatigue.
Exercise is also one of the best ways to release the feel-good hormone, serotonin. But it is much better to walk for a half hour outside in the sunlight than to get on the treadmill inside. So, if you can bare the chill in the air, head outside and get that body moving.
Use a SAD Light
Of course, there will be those days when the sun refuses to show its face and the weather is too severe to spend much, if any, time outside. The use of a SAD light can help reduce the symptoms of seasonal depression.
SAD lights are also called light therapy boxes, and the light they produce mimics natural outdoor light. Light therapy is believed to affect brain chemicals linked to mood and sleep, like serotonin and melatonin, easing SAD symptoms.
Eat More Produce
Feelings of anxiety are common among those suffering with seasonal depression, but according to Dr. Uma Naidoo of Harvard Medical School, relief may be found at the end of your fork. Fruits and vegetables are rich sources of essential nutrients like magnesium and zinc that ease anxiety and make people feel calmer. While you may be tempted to eat starchy comfort foods like bread and pasta, your best bet is to load up on as many whole foods as you can, with an emphasis on organic produce.
While the cold weather is likely to have most of us dreaming about spring, winter doesn’t have to be an emotional trial. By following these tips you may be able to lesson your SAD symptoms and get through winter unscathed.
If you or a loved one is currently feeling overwhelmed by SAD symptoms, and is interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.
Many people are familiar with depression, but only some are aware that there are actually numerous different forms of it. Below, we explore four of the most common types of depression. 1. Major Depressive Disorder For someone to be diagnosed with major depressive disorder, they must have experienced at least five symptoms of depression for […]
Many people are familiar with depression, but only some are aware that there are actually numerous different forms of it. Below, we explore four of the most common types of depression.
For someone to be diagnosed with major depressive disorder, they must have experienced at least five symptoms of depression for at least two consecutive weeks, with at least one symptom being depressed mood or loss of interest or pleasure (this is referred to as a “major depressive episode”). Many people with this disorder experience major depressive episodes on a recurring basis.
Also referred to as “dysthymia,” persistent depressive disorder occurs when someone experiences a low-level depressed mood for an extended period of time. When compared to the symptoms of major depressive disorder, the symptoms of persistent depressive disorder typically aren’t as severe.
As its name suggests, seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is associated with a change in the seasons. Although it can occur during spring and summer, it most commonly affects people during fall and winter.
Postpartum depression can cause a woman who recently gave birth to feel sad, indifferent, anxious, and exhausted. This is different from “baby blues,” which usually last for only a couple weeks after childbirth—postpartum depression can persist for months or even years.
If you think you might have depression—one of the types described above or a different form—our therapists can help. We have extensive experience treating depression, and we can provide you with customized recommendations for how to move forward and start feeling happier. Contact us today to schedule a therapy session.
Christmas is right around the corner. A time of fun and festivities, delights, and decadence. A time when we can enjoy our friends and family and live it up a little. And then January rolls around, and many of us find ourselves feeling a bit blue. And this is why “Blue Monday” has been […]
Christmas is right around the corner. A time of fun and festivities, delights, and decadence. A time when we can enjoy our friends and family and live it up a little.
And then January rolls around, and many of us find ourselves feeling a bit blue. And this is why “Blue Monday” has been established.
Recognized on the third Monday in January, Blue Monday is considered by many to be the saddest day of the year. For some of us, the cold and bleak landscape outside punctuates how we feel as we stare at our credit card bills, wondering if all those fancy gifts were such a good idea. To add insult to injury, we’ve already started breaking our New Year’s resolutions and we’ve got to get back to work after office parties and time off.
If you tend to be someone who feels a bit sad during the weeks following the holidays, there are some things you can do to lift your mood.
Studies have conclusively shown that having something to look forward to can lift our spirits. If you can’t afford to take an extravagant vacation, plan a weekend away with your partner or friend. Or even just by yourself! You can even make this a yearly event where every Blue Monday, you get the maps out and plan your next adventure.
Who says the festivities must end after New Year’s Eve? Why not get a group of loved ones together who are all feeling a bit blue and make some fun of your own? Make it blue-themed where everyone must dress all in blue, have blue food and blue cocktails.
Studies have shown that people who take up hobbies typically have less stress and a better mood. Learning a new skill gives us joy. So think about taking a cooking class or learning to play the piano or something else that grabs your imagination.
While many people will eventually come out of this blue period, some will not. Some individuals may be struggling with seasonal affective disorder or depression that has been brought on by something else. If you feel you are dealing with something more than just the post-holiday blues, please speak with someone.
If you’d like to explore treatment options, I encourage you to reach out to me. I’m more than happy to discuss how I may be able to help.
SOURCES:
Many of us experienced social isolation during the recent pandemic. And none of us will deny that those days and weeks were very hard. Thankfully, the pandemic is over, and life for the majority of us has returned to normal. But for some people, social isolation didn’t go away; it is a part of their […]
Many of us experienced social isolation during the recent pandemic. And none of us will deny that those days and weeks were very hard. Thankfully, the pandemic is over, and life for the majority of us has returned to normal.
But for some people, social isolation didn’t go away; it is a part of their “normal” existence.
There are a variety of circumstances that cause people to be isolated from others, or to choose to isolate themselves:
We know there is a strong mind-body connection. How we feel emotionally effects how we feel physically. Studies are now revealing how social isolation can negatively impact our health. Here are just some of the effects on your health:
If you are isolated from others for any reason, it is important to recognize you may be suffering mentally, emotionally, and/or physically. Here are some ways you can cope with the situation:
If you would like to speak to someone about your anxiety or depression caused by isolation as well as the reasons for the isolation, please reach out to me. I offer online therapy for those who feel more comfortable accessing help from home.
SOURCES:
Understanding the Effects of Social Isolation on Mental Health
https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/social-isolation-mental-health
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/isolation-and-mental-health
If you live in a colder climate, you know it can be challenging dealing with a lack of sunlight and being stuck inside due to frigid temps during winter months. It is for these reasons many people experience what is called “the winter blues.” But seasonal depression goes much deeper than this. Also known as […]
If you live in a colder climate, you know it can be challenging dealing with a lack of sunlight and being stuck inside due to frigid temps during winter months. It is for these reasons many people experience what is called “the winter blues.”
But seasonal depression goes much deeper than this. Also known as Seasonal Affective Disorder – or SAD – seasonal depression results in fatigue, a loss of interest in socializing and activities, weight gain and more. Symptoms usually begin to present in the fall and last until the sunnier, warmer days of spring.
If you suffer from seasonal depression, there are things you can do to stop it in its tracks this year:
When winter comes, the light goes. It gets darker earlier and we simply can’t spend as much time in the sun. To combat this, it is recommended those with seasonal depression use a light therapy box. And best to start using it each year in the beginning of fall, before your SAD symptoms even have a chance to take hold.
When it’s cold and nasty out and we’re feeling sad and depressed, most of us will reach for those comfort foods that are laden with processed sugars and trans fats. But these foods will usually make us feel even more tired and depressed. To add insult to injury, eating bad foods only helps us to gain weight, which can make us feel more depressed. Best to stick to a diet consisting of whole foods rich in healthy fats and carbs, some quality protein and vitamins and minerals.
People with seasonal depression tend to isolate themselves during the winter months, and this can, again, exacerbate the depression. Do your best to stay involved with your social circle. Friends can be a great support during this challenging time.
You may also want to speak with someone about how you’re feeling. A therapist can offer tools and advice that will help you navigate your feelings. If you’d like more information about how counseling can help with seasonal depression, please give my office a call!
SOURCES:
https://www.mytransformations.com/post/12-things-you-can-do-today-to-get-ahead-of-your-seasonal-depression-this-year
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9293-seasonal-depression
https://www.dailydoseofluxury.com/single-post/2021/11/12/7-ways-to-get-ahead-of-seasonal-depression
Into each life a little rain must fall is a way of saying every one of us will experience sadness in our lifetime. It is completely normal and natural. But there are some people who feel something deeper and darker than sadness, and they may feel this way despite there being no triggering event such […]
Into each life a little rain must fall is a way of saying every one of us will experience sadness in our lifetime. It is completely normal and natural. But there are some people who feel something deeper and darker than sadness, and they may feel this way despite there being no triggering event such as the loss of a loved one.
So how can we tell the difference between sadness and depression?
As I just mentioned, sadness is a normal reaction to a difficult event in our life. We may feel sad because of a breakup or from losing a loved one or from leaving our friends after graduation. In other words, we feel sadness about something.
Depression, on the other hand, affects not only our emotions but also how we act and perceive the world. Depression does not require a triggering event. In fact, when we’re depressed, we tend to feel upset about any- and everything.
Depression clouds our entire lives. When we’re depressed, nothing feels as enjoyable or worthwhile as it once did. In short, we simply feel less alive.
To be diagnosed with depression, an individual must be diagnosed with at least five of the following common symptoms for a continual duration of at least two weeks:
If you or a loved one are experiencing depressed, it is very important to reach out for help from a trained mental health therapist. Depression robs you of your life, purpose and happiness, but there are strategies to break free and find joy once again.
I would be happy to discuss some treatment options with you. Please give my office a call.
SOURCES:
https://www.healthline.com/health/depression/depression-vs-sadness
https://screening.mhanational.org/content/am-i-depressed-or-just-sad/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/201510/the-important-difference-between-sadness-and-depression