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    Identifying and Cultivating Personal Strengths

    April 27, 2022

    Increase wellness by identifying strengths

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    Identifying and Cultivating Personal Strengths

    April 27, 2022

    Personal Strengths

    Positive psychology is the study of well-being  and identifies  tools and behaviors that increase positive feelings. One area of research   is  cultivating personal strengths to increase wellness.  A personal strength is defined as “a pre-existing capacity for a particular way of behaving, thinking, or feeling that is authentic and energizing to the user, and enables optimal functioning, development, and performance”(Paquette,2018). 

     

    Research suggests that people who identify and use personal strengths:

     

    show a decrease in depression, 

    increased sense of well being,

    Increased optimism, 

    stronger social and romantic relationships, 

    buffers against stress.



    Positive Psychology researchers Martin Seligman and Christopher Peterson identified seven categories of strengths:

     

    Wisdom and Knowledge:

    Strengths: Creativity, curiosity, open-mindedness, love of learning, perspective

     

    Humanity:

    Strengths: love, kindness, social intelligence,

     

    Courage:

    Strengths: bravery, integrity, persistence, vitality

     

    Justice:

    Strengths: citizenship, fairness, leadership

     

    Temperance:

    Strengths: forgiveness and mercy, humility and modesty, prudence, self-regulation

     

    Transcendence:

    Strengths: appreciation of beauty and excellence, gratitude, hope, humor, spirituality 

     

    Identifying personal strengths:

    Perhaps the easiest way to identify personal strengths  is to take Seligman and Peterson’s Values in Action survey at www.viacharacter.org.  This free online survey will identify your core strengths.




    Incorporating Personal Strengths into daily life:

    Once you’ve identified your strengths, take some time to ask yourself the following:

    How am I using my strengths in my daily life? 

    Am I using all my strengths?

    Are there new ways to use neglected strengths in my daily life?

     

    Identifying and using your personal strengths increases well being.  If you  needs help identifying your  strengths, psychotherapy can help.    Meeting with a psychologist  can help you explored blocks to happiness and embracing the best parts of yourself. 

     

    Resources:

    The Happiness Toolbox by Jonah Paquette(2018)

    VIA Character Strengths:

    https://www.viacharacter.org/

     

    Pamela Marsh, Psy.D.

     

    Pamela Marsh is a licensed psychologist at Marsh Psychology Group. She can be reached at pmarsh@marshpsychologygroup.com or 248-869-2024.

    Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression, Self-Esteem

    Positive Psychology: Gratitude

    April 6, 2022

    Gratitude to improve your mood

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    Positive Psychology: Gratitude

    April 6, 2022

    Positive Psychology: Gratitude

    Positive Psychology is the science of well-being. It focuses on skills that foster good feelings and resilience. One of the most powerful and impactful area of positive psychology is the practice of gratitude.

    Gratitude is defined as a sense of wonder, thankfulness, and appreciation for life. It consisted of 2 related steps:

    1. Acknowledging the goodness that is present in our life.
    2. Recognize that the source of these blessings lies at least in part outside our selves.

       

    Research shows that regular gratitude practice impacts both our psychology and bodies. First, gratitude has been shown to “ decrease rates of depression and stress, while enhancing positive mental states such as joy, optimism and tranquility”(Paquette, 2018). Second, people who regularly practice gratitude, have overall improved physical health, stronger immune systems, and reduced rates of stress-related illnesses. Third, our brains change structurally and chemically in ways that increase well-being.

    Jonah Paquette, Psy.D.(2018) suggests a good place to start is to start noticing positive occurrences in our daily lives. The “Three Good Things” technique is a simple way to start a gratitude practice. You will need a few sheets of paper or a notebook and a pen/pencil for this exercise. 

    Three Good Things

    Instructions: Before bed each night for 2 weeks

    1) Write down three things that went well that day. They can be little or big things, there is no right answer. Example: I had a restful day off and feel relaxed.

    2) Explain why you think this happened and or your contribution to the event. Example: I had a restful day because I kept the TV turned off and did not check my work email.

    Try to challenge yourself not to repeat an entry over the next 2 weeks.

    Shifting to a Gratitude Mindset

    Once you feel comfortable noticing good things in your life, change your journal entries to reflect what you are grateful for, and explain your reasoning. This subtle adjustment adds a deeper meaning to your practice. It widens the “goodness” in your life to include an acknowledgment of an external source of goodness and an experience of being thankful. This shift deepens the positive impact on your mood and physical health.

    References and resources:

    The Happiness Tool Box by Jonah Paquette, Psy.D. 2018 PESI Publishing and Media, Eau Claire, WI.

    https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/

    Be Well,

    Dr. Marsh

    Pamela Marsh, Psy.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist at Marsh Psychology Group, in Huntington Woods, Michigan. She can be reached at pmarsh@marshpsychologygroup.com

    Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression, General, stress, Uncategorized

    The Importance of Community for Your Mental Health

    March 30, 2022

    Our mental health significantly impacts our quality of life, so it makes sense that we would want to do all we can to improve it. This may include things like eating healthy foods, exercising, and getting enough quality sleep each night.  But there is something else that greatly influences our mental health and that is […]

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    The Importance of Community for Your Mental Health

    March 30, 2022

    Our mental health significantly impacts our quality of life, so it makes sense that we would want to do all we can to improve it. This may include things like eating healthy foods, exercising, and getting enough quality sleep each night. 

    But there is something else that greatly influences our mental health and that is a community and a sense of belonging. Human beings are wired for connection. When we feel connected to others, we feel loved and supported. Friends can often help alleviate the stress in our life because our friends are there for us to lean on.

    If you have been feeling alone and isolated, here are some ways you can find your own community and begin to connect with others:

    Go with What Interests You

    What activities and hobbies do you have? You may want to join a book club or take a painting lesson. If you’re athletic or used to playing a sport in school, maybe you could join a local team. You’ll no doubt find it easier to connect with others who enjoy doing the same things you do.

    Volunteer

    Being of service to others is highly rewarding, and volunteering is also a great way to connect with others who share similar values. What causes do you feel passionate about? What charities do you support? Check out their website or give them a call to see what volunteering opportunities they may have available.

    Connect with Something Bigger Than Yourself

    Do you have a particular religion or spiritual practice you connect with? Maybe it’s time to get back to your church or try taking that meditation class you’ve been thinking about. Is there a political cause that speaks to your heart? Helping others reach a meaningful goal can be a great way to find purpose in your own life.

    Humans are not meant to be alone. We need to socialize. If you have been feeling down, now’s the time to go out and make some new connections.

    And if you’ve been dealing with depression and anxiety for some time and could use someone to talk to, please give me a call.

    SOURCES:

    • https://nami.org/Blogs/NAMI-Blog/November-2019/The-Importance-of-Community-and-Mental-Health
    • https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-mild-cognitive-impairment/201606/the-health-benefits-socializing
    • https://dailylife.com/article/7-ways-your-friendships-improve-your-mental-health

    Filed Under: Depression

    4 Ways to Better Understand & Cope with a Midlife Crisis

    February 19, 2022

    It is said that if you live long enough, you’ll eventually hit middle age. Once they hit that mark, many people begin to look around at their life and notice what is working and what isn’t. Unfortunately, some people notice much of their life isn’t working, at least not in the way they thought it […]

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    4 Ways to Better Understand & Cope with a Midlife Crisis

    February 19, 2022

    It is said that if you live long enough, you’ll eventually hit middle age. Once they hit that mark, many people begin to look around at their life and notice what is working and what isn’t. Unfortunately, some people notice much of their life isn’t working, at least not in the way they thought it would, and a crisis strikes.

    What’s Really Going on in a Midlife Crisis?

    For many of us, middle age is the first time in our lives that we pause for a moment to reflect. Birth, in a way, is like a slingshot, catapulting us into life at a significant speed. That momentum never slows as we gain an education, make friends, choose a career, commit to a significant other, have children, raise them as best we can, and plan for our retirement.

    Eventually the pace of life begins to slow and we find we have more time to take stock of our lives; of what we’ve become and where we seem to be headed. And what do many of us find at this juncture?

    We find we’ve been so busy earning a good living, keeping up with the Joneses (whoever they are), and pleasing everyone around us, that we haven’t always made decisions based on our own self-interests. In other words, we find ourselves lost and unable to recognize our lives as anything that we once imagined.

    4 Ways to Cope with a Midlife Crisis

    It’s important to understand that in this situation, the word “crisis” is a bit dramatic. Midlife crises aren’t traumas; they are instead wakeup calls that alert us to the fact we need to start taking better care of our minds, hearts and bodies.

    With this in mind, here are four ways you can cope with your own midlife wakeup call.

    Get Active

    As I mentioned, midlife is generally when many of us finally begin to slow down. While this slowing can lead to mental and emotional insights, it can also lead to aches and pains. In other words, slow your pace of life but not your physical activity.

    Now is the time to become even more active. If you haven’t been exercising, start now. Take up a new sport, try dance lessons, go hiking. Keeping your body limber and pain-free will help you stay positive.

    Embrace Your Creative Side

    Everyone has a creative side. That’s what life is, one big creative project. But many of us completely ignore our creative impulses either because of a lack of time or a belief that we’re “not talented enough.” That’s hogwash! Tapping into your creativity is one of the best ways to reconnect with your true self.

    Do something to feed your creativity. Write in a journal. Learn how to paint. Take piano lessons. Not only will this bring you joy, learning something new keeps your brain young and active and fends off dementia and Alzheimer’s.

    Make Some Changes

    Midlife is an opportunity to make some changes you’ve been wanting to make. A change could be a simple as finally painting a room in your house, to getting your teeth whitened or a tattoo you’ve had your eye on, or to finally dumping some of your toxic friends. Start making choices based on your own needs, you’ve earned it.

    Hang Out with Like-Minded People

    Social interaction is key to a happy and healthy life. But many of us spend the majority of our adult lives around people we don’t like very much: namely coworkers and the parents of our children’s friends. Now is the time to surround yourself with those people who support and nourish you, and share common passions and interests.

    A midlife crisis doesn’t have to be a crisis at all but a chance for you to take control and make different choices in your life.

    If you or a loved one is experiencing a midlife crisis and is interested in exploring treatment, please contact me today. I would be happy to speak with you about how I may be able to help.

    Filed Under: Depression

    Why Someone Suffering From Depression Can’t Just ‘Get Over It’

    February 9, 2022

    When talking about depression, a lot of people forget that depression is an illness that requires proper attention and treatment. If you’re depressed, it can be incredibly frustrating to hear things like “Just get over it”, “You’re being really dramatic”, “You have to be strong”, “Learn to deal with it”, “Happiness is a choice”. You […]

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    Why Someone Suffering From Depression Can’t Just ‘Get Over It’

    February 9, 2022

    When talking about depression, a lot of people forget that depression is an illness that requires proper attention and treatment. If you’re depressed, it can be incredibly frustrating to hear things like “Just get over it”, “You’re being really dramatic”, “You have to be strong”, “Learn to deal with it”, “Happiness is a choice”. You might start to think of things like ‘Why can’t I just get over it’? We can stop ourselves from doing destructive things like putting our hand in a fire, but when it comes to depression, it’s a bit difficult to just ‘stop’. There are a number of reasons why ‘get over it’ statements like this don’t help. Here are some of the best reasons why.

    1. It’s an illness– Depression is an illness, an illness that you have little control over, just like any other illness. Nobody tells people with broken bones to get over their pain. So why should depressed people be forced to ‘get over’ theirs? Always remember that your pain is valid, and as long as you’re getting help by speaking to a mental health professional, you’re on the path to healing.
    2. The brain is in control– Studies have shown that people experiencing depression have symptoms controlled by an unconscious emotional process that is usually beyond their control. Remember that depression is an incredibly complex disease caused by a combination of biological, psychological and sociological factors.
    3. The symptoms can be debilitating– Depressed people exhibit both physical and emotional symptoms. These symptoms include things like nausea, headaches, restlessness, fatigue and insomnia.
    4. You can’t wish it away– Nobody likes being depressed. Just because you want to feel better doesn’t mean you can wave a wand and get rid of it. You can desire to feel better, but until you work with a therapist, there is no magical route to getting better.
    5. You can’t always pretend– People always act like depressed people should plaster a huge smile on their face and pretend like everything is perfect. You can’t just shove your emotions down and pretend like they don’t exist. The mind keeps replaying them. This is its way of reminding you that you have an ongoing issue that needs to be handled by a professional.
    6. Depression isn’t ‘one size fits all’– People experience depression in different ways and exhibit different symptoms. Just because they can go about their daily activities efficiently doesn’t mean they’re not ill. Don’t compare yourself to other people. Depression changes everything and there’s no universal treatment. A therapist can help you find a treatment perfectly suited to you.

    Depression is real and painful. Just because you can’t see or touch it doesn’t make it any less real. If you suffer from depression or know someone who does, working with a therapist is a good start to overcoming your depression. I am available to help. Contact me to book a therapy session.

    Filed Under: Depression

    4 Ways to Change Your Thoughts and Relieve Depression

    February 6, 2022

    Did you know that on most days, the average person has between 25,000 and 50,000 thoughts? That’s an impressive amount of thoughts. But when happens when the majority of these thoughts are negative? Imagine the impact on your psyche and your life if you had thousands and thousands of negative thoughts each day? This amount of negative […]

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    4 Ways to Change Your Thoughts and Relieve Depression

    February 6, 2022

    Did you know that on most days, the average person has between 25,000 and 50,000 thoughts? That’s an impressive amount of thoughts.

    But when happens when the majority of these thoughts are negative? Imagine the impact on your psyche and your life if you had thousands and thousands of negative thoughts each day?

    This amount of negative thinking is a hallmark of depression. Negative or pessimistic thinking is depression speaking for you. It is the voice of depression. What many people don’t realize is that depression is manifested in negative thinking before it ever creates a negative thought itself.

    This is why it is imperative for those suffering from depression to become acutely aware of their thought patterns. If not checked, negative thinking becomes a habit, one that has the potential to completely shape your life.

    Change How You Think

    One of the most powerful ways people can lift themselves out of the darkness of depression is to change their thinking patterns. This is why cognitive therapy is such a profound change agent. The approach is based on the fact that thought-processing errors contribute to a depressed mood.

    By changing how you think, you automatically change how you feel. Once you become aware that changing your thinking is important, you are presented with an active choice you can take to benefit your mental health.

    I know. This sounds about as easy as changing a tire in the rain with nothing more than a hardboiled egg and a paper clip. But it can be done.

    Here are some tips on how you can begin to change your negative thoughts:

    Keep Track of Your Thoughts

    Many people are in denial about their thought patterns. They don’t want to believe they are overly negative or pessimistic. Catching yourself and recording as many negative thoughts as you can will help you to see your own mental patterns.

    What will these thoughts look like? You could write things like, “I hate my feet.” “My boss is an idiot.” “I hate spring.” “I hate getting up this early.” “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

    Be particularly mindful of making sweeping generalizations from one specific event. It’s a type of black and white thinking that can be particularly harmful.

    Identify Triggers

    Once you get an idea for the frequency of your negative thoughts, try and pinpoint the triggers for them. Your journal will also come in handy here, because it will point out certain types of events that set off a chain of negative thoughts. Triggers can include being rejected or ignored, or having an unkind remark said about or to you.

    Positive Conversion

    You have so far learned that the human thinking process is habitual. But the good news is, you can create good thinking habits.

    To do this you’ve got to start converting all of those negative thoughts into positive ones. It will be hard at first, and you will most likely feel as if you’re lying to yourself and pretending to be a glass-half-full Pollyanna.

    But, as they say, “You’ve got to fake it until you make it.” Though thinking positively may feel foreign to you and like a waste of your time, you are re-training your brain to think (and feel) good.

    Every time you have a negative thought, stop, recognize it as negative, and immediately flip the switch and create the positive opposite thought in its place. This could look like:

    Negative thought: “I’ll never get this report done on time.”

    Positive Switch: “I’m making great progress and being careful to always check my work.”

    To get the hang of how to do this, go through your negativity journal and create a separate column in which you will write the positive opposites of your many negative thoughts.

    If you feel too dark and down to complete these exercises, please consider reaching out to a trained therapist who can prescribe medication, should you require it, and help you work through these struggles.

    If you or a loved one are suffering from depression and are interested in exploring treatment options, please contact me. I would be happy to discuss how I may be able to help.

    Filed Under: Depression

    The Best Medicine is a Treadmill: How Daily Exercise Can Treat Depression

    January 29, 2022

    According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, about 9% of American adults live with depression. It’s also worth mentioning that a major depressive episode is the leading cause of disability for Americans between the ages of 15 and 44. Antidepressants are commonly prescribed to treat people with moderate or severe depression. And while […]

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    The Best Medicine is a Treadmill: How Daily Exercise Can Treat Depression

    January 29, 2022

    According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, about 9% of American adults live with depression. It’s also worth mentioning that a major depressive episode is the leading cause of disability for Americans between the ages of 15 and 44.

    Antidepressants are commonly prescribed to treat people with moderate or severe depression. And while these drugs do offer some relief, they often come with some pretty nasty side effects such as:

    • headaches
    • nausea
    • trouble sleeping
    • dizziness
    • diarrhea
    • weakness and fatigue
    • anxiety
    • stomach upset
    • dry mouth
    • sexual problems such as low sex drive, erectile dysfunction, or ejaculation problems
    • trouble urinating
    • fast heart rate
    • sweating
    • memory problems
    • fatigue
    • weight gain

    That’s quite a list.

    The obvious problem is these side effects can make someone who is depressed feel even worse. But there is some good news.

    Exercise Helps Beat Depression Naturally

    Studies on exercise and depression are conclusive: Not only does exercise treat depression, it can also prevent it. In fact, researchers from Duke University found exercise to be as effective as medicine.

    Exercise not only increases blood flow to the brain, it also releases endorphins, which are the body’s own natural antidepressants. Exercise also releases other neurotransmitters, like serotonin, which lift mood.

    The really good news is, it only takes moderate exercise three times a week to reap the antidepressant benefits. You don’t have to train for a marathon or a triathlon to feel better. Here are a few exercise ideas to get you started:

    Walk Your Dog

    Take your dog(s) for a half hour walk around the neighborhood. Not only will your body release endorphins but your dog’s health will also benefit from routine exercise.

    Go for a Bike Ride

    Family bike rides are a great way to bond and get a good workout at the same time. If the weather doesn’t permit outdoor biking, a stationary bike is a good investment.

    Swim

    Swimming is one of the absolute best total body exercises. As a bonus, the steady movements through water also has a naturally calming effect.

    Walk at Lunch

    Grab a few friends and/or colleagues on your lunch break and go for a half hour walk.

    Exercise doesn’t have to be hard or complicated. Whatever form you like, commit to doing that at least three times a week and see if you don’t start to feel better.

    You may also want to speak with a therapist, who can help you navigate your emotions and offer tools for coping. If you’d like to explore treatment options, please get in touch with me. I would be more than happy to discuss how I may be able to help.

    Filed Under: Depression

    10 Signs You Might Be a “Highly Sensitive Person”

    January 26, 2022

    Are you a highly sensitive person (HSP)? If so, you’re not alone. It is estimated that roughly 15 to 20 percent of the population is highly sensitive. In fact, scientists now believe there is a gene behind this trait. But what does it mean to be highly sensitive? The HSP is generally defined as someone […]

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    10 Signs You Might Be a “Highly Sensitive Person”

    January 26, 2022

    Are you a highly sensitive person (HSP)? If so, you’re not alone. It is estimated that roughly 15 to 20 percent of the population is highly sensitive. In fact, scientists now believe there is a gene behind this trait.

    But what does it mean to be highly sensitive? The HSP is generally defined as someone with “acute physical, mental, and emotional responses to external (social, environmental) or internal (intra-personal) stimuli.”

    The bad news is, being highly sensitive can make many “normal” life situations feel awkward and downright uncomfortable. But fear not, there are some benefits to being highly sensitive, and I’ll share those a little later in this post.

    Signs You May Be a Highly Sensitive Person

    If you are curious whether you may be part of the population that is highly sensitive, here are 10 signs to look for:

    1. You are quick to feel negative emotions such as sadness and anxiety.
    2. You may feel physical symptoms in relation to these emotions, such as headaches and muscle tension.
    3. You become overwhelmed with physical stimuli such as sound, light and smells.
    4. You have never felt comfortable around crowds. The energy of the crowd easily overwhelms you.
    5. You become very emotional over the injustices of the world. (you cry or become angry at the thought of children or animals being harmed, as an example)
    6. You often worry what others think of you.
    7. You take things personally.
    8. You have a hard time letting things go and receiving critical feedback.
    9. You avoid most social situations and prefer to stay home alone.
    10. You startle easily to loud noises.

    Benefits of Being a Highly Sensitive Person

    As I mentioned earlier, while being a HSP can cause you to feel awkward or overwhelmed at times, there are some definite perks to being highly sensitive. For starters, you are someone who can enjoy subtle sensory detail that a majority of the population misses. You get pleasure from noticing the end of day light play. You’ll notice subtle shades of color and texture and feel immense pleasure at the complexities of Indian cuisine.

    You’re also someone others like being around because you are aware of others’ feelings, needs and emotions. Because of this natural empathy, HSPs make great teachers, managers and leaders.

    HSPs are also incredibly creative. Many artists, musicians and famous actors are highly sensitive people who have gifted the world with their talent and insight into what it means to be human.

    As you can see, if you can manage the negative aspects of being a highly sensitive person, you can reap some pretty great rewards.

    If you or someone you love suspects they are a HSP and would like to explore treatment options to manage those negative aspects, please get in touch with me. I’d love to discuss how I may be able to help.

    Filed Under: Depression, Women's Issues

    October is National Depression & Mental Health Screening Month

    October 9, 2021

    October is National Depression and Mental Health Screening Month, a time when clinicians and their communities come together to spread awareness and combat mental illness. By working together, we can all promote the importance of mental health screenings while reducing the stigma associated with mental health illnesses.  Common Symptoms of Depression The following are some […]

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    October is National Depression & Mental Health Screening Month

    October 9, 2021

    October is National Depression and Mental Health Screening Month, a time when clinicians and their communities come together to spread awareness and combat mental illness. By working together, we can all promote the importance of mental health screenings while reducing the stigma associated with mental health illnesses. 

    Common Symptoms of Depression

    The following are some of the most common symptoms of depression. If you or someone you love has been experiencing one or more of these nearly every day for at least two weeks, it’s a sign you or they may be suffering from depression:

    • Persistent sadness or anxiety
    • Feeling hopeless
    • Irritability
    • Loss of interest in hobbies 
    • Decreased energy or fatigue
    • Becoming more and more isolated
    • Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
    • Difficulty sleeping
    • Loss of appetite
    • Thoughts of death or suicide

    What Clinicians are Doing

    It’s common for people battling depression to feel worse during the holidays. That’s one reason why the month of October was chosen as the awareness month; because it gives people plenty of lead time to get help before the festivities hit.

    During this time, many clinicians, hospitals, and mental health facilities will either reduce or completely waive the fees for mental health screenings. This makes it far easier for those individuals who believe they may be suffering from depression to receive an affordable and accurate diagnosis.

    What Can You Do?

    If you or someone you love is suffering from depression, it’s important to get screened. After your screening, a qualified practitioner will discuss a treatment plan with you that may include talk therapy, medication, or a combination of the two.

    If you are someone who has recovered from depression, it’s a wonderful idea to share your journey with others if you feel comfortable doing so. Often when people are struggling with their own darkness, knowing someone has walked through to the other side and is living once again in the light, can offer hope and encouragement.

    If you or someone you love is interested in speaking with a trained therapist, please reach out to me. I would be happy to discuss how I might help.

    SOURCES:

    • https://www.naccho.org/blog/articles/national-depression-and-mental-health-screening-month-provides-opportunities-for-local-health-departments
    • https://www.rtor.org/2020/10/08/national-depression-and-mental-health-screening-month/
    • https://www.chconline.org/october-is-national-depression-and-mental-health-screening-month/

    Filed Under: Depression, mental health awareness

    The Truth About Perfectionism

    June 2, 2021

    We live in a society that values things that appear perfect. And I suppose there are things that can be perfect. Architects can draw the perfect straight line, mathematicians can solve an equation with a perfect calculation, and a chocolate cake can be perfectly moist. But as human beings, we can never reach a state […]

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    The Truth About Perfectionism

    June 2, 2021

    We live in a society that values things that appear perfect. And I suppose there are things that can be perfect. Architects can draw the perfect straight line, mathematicians can solve an equation with a perfect calculation, and a chocolate cake can be perfectly moist.

    But as human beings, we can never reach a state of perfection because we will always be a work in progress. Perfection indicates a finality – a finished product – but we as humans are always growing and changing.

    What is Perfectionism?

    Many people view perfectionism as a positive attribute. They believe the more “perfect” they are, the more success they will have in life.

    Perfectionism is NOT the same thing as always doing your best. It is important that we always do our best. By doing so, we can experience healthy achievements and growth. But perfectionism takes this concept to the extreme.

    People with perfectionist tendencies often have self-defeating thoughts and/or behaviors that actually make it HARDER to achieve their goals. Perfectionism also can make the individual feel stress, anxiety, and depression.

    Signs to Look For

    Most human beings, from time to time, will strive for perfectionism in some aspect of their life. As an example, that “perfectly moist chocolate cake” I mentioned earlier got that way because the person who baked it was trying to get everything JUST RIGHT as a gift for someone’s birthday.

    But there are those people who are “full-time” perfectionists. They strive for perfection in all aspects of their life.

    Here are some signs you may be a perfectionist:

    • You don’t like to attempt tasks or activities unless you feel you can complete them perfectly.
    • You are end-oriented, meaning you focus little on the process of creating or learning something and put all of the emphasis on the outcome.
    • You cannot see a task as having been completed unless it meets your perfectionist standards.
    • You tend to procrastinate because you don’t like starting a task until you know you can perfectly complete it.
    • You tend to take far longer completing tasks than others. This can be problematic at work.

    Getting Help

    Again, perfectionism is not the same thing as doing your best. It is a condition whereby the individual is almost incapable of feeling joy or pride at what they accomplish because in their own minds, they are never quite good enough.

    If you believe you may have traits of perfectionism and it is causing you stress, there are things you can do to change your behavior so you can live a healthier and happier life.
    If you’d like to explore treatment options, please reach out to me.

    SOURCES:

    • https://cogbtherapy.com/cbt-blog/2014/7/9/stop-perfectionism-be-happy-with-good-enough
    • https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/issues/perfectionism/overcome
    • https://www.goodtherapy.org/learn-about-therapy/issues/perfectionism

    Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression

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